The Inday Adventures (Manuscript)

Dahil sa tindi ng kahirapan sa probinsya, namasukan si Inday bilang katulong sa Maynila. Habang ini-interview ng amo…


Amo: Kelangan namin ng katulong para mag ayos ng bahay, magluto, maglaba, magplantsa, mamalengke, at magbantay ng mga bata. Kaya mo ba ang lahat ng ito?


Inday: I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of the work that you want, my creativity, productivity and work-efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress.


Amo: [nosebleed]

Kinabukasan, habang nasa opisina ang amo, may tumawag sa telepono.


Inday: Hi, you are calling in the midst of me cooking our lunch, my superiors aren’t around. I’m the immediate person in support. How may i help you? If you wish to leave a message, an abrupt tone means your diverted to our voicemail.


Caller: [Ibinaba ang telepono]


Nakaraan ang dalawang araw, umuwi ang amo, nakitang me bukol si junior.


Amo: Bakit me bukol si junior?


Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.


Amo: [nosebleed ulit]


Kinagabihan, habang naghahapunan.


Amo: Bakit maalat ang ulam?

Inday: The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride (NaCl) affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize.


Amo: [nosebleed na naman]


Tapos, sabi pa…


Amo: Bakit tuwing paguwi ko, nadadatnan kitang nanunuod ng tv?!


Inday: Because I don’t want you to see me doing absolutely nothing.


Amo: [hinimatay]


Kinabukasan, sinamahan ni Inday si junior sa principal’s office dahil di makapunta ang amo at donya.


Principal: Sinuntok ni junior ang kanyang kaklase.


Inday: It’s absurd! It was never a fact that he will inflict a fight. I can only imagine how you handle schizophrenic kids on this educational institution. Revise your policies because they suck!


Principal: [nag resign]


Pag dating sa bahay, nandun na ang amo, galit na galit.


Amo: Inday, bakit nagkalat ang basura sa likod ng bahay?!


Inday: A change in the weather patterns might have occurred wrecking havoc to the surroundings. The way the debris are scattered indicates that the gust of wind was going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading for.


Amo: [nosebleed ulit]


Habang nagluluto si Inday ng hapunan, malikot si junior.


Inday: Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property damages and if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be inflicted upon you!


Junior: [takbo sa CR, punasan ang nagdudugong ilong]


Pagkatapos magluto, nanood na ng TV si Inday. Nabalitaan nya umalis si Angel Locsin sa GMA 7.


Junior: Bakit kaya sya umalis?


Inday: Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons but because they just know that things will get worse if they’ll stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it’s harder when people can’t understand you for doing so.


Junior: [tuloy ang pagdugo ng ilong]


Dumating ang amo bago maghapunan.


Amo: Day! Bakit may rashes si Junjun?


Inday: Allergens triggered the immune response. Eosinophillic migratin occurs to the reaction site and release of chemotactic and anaphylotoxin including histamine and protaglandins. These substance results to increased circulation to the site promoting redness.


Amo: Sori?

Nung gabing yon, me nag text ke Inday. Si Dodong, ang driver ng kapitbahay, gusto maki pag text-mate.


Inday: To forestall further hopes of acquaintance, my unfathomable statement to the denial of your request – Petition denied.


Di nagla-on, dahil sa tyaga ni Dodong, nagging syota nya rin si Inday. Pero di tumagal ang kanilang relasyon, at nakipag-break si Inday ke Dodong.


Inday: The statute restricts me to love you but you have the provocations. The way you smile is the proximate cause why I love you. We have some rules to think of. We have no vested rights to love each other because the upper household dismissed my petition!


Dodong: Perhaps you are mistaken, what you seem to contrive as any affections for you are somewhat half-hearted. I was merely attempting to expand my network of interests by involving you in my daily recreation. Heretofor, you can expect an end to any verbal articulation from myself

Me dumaan na mamang basurero, at narinig ang usapan ni Inday at Dodong.

Basurero (sabi ke Inday): Be careful in letting go of the things you thought are just nothing because maybe someday you’ll realize that the one you gave away is the very thing you’ve been wishing for to stay.


Kinagabihan, kinausap si Inday ng kanyang amo…


Inday: Being a third party doesn’t mean that you’re destroying a relationship. It only means that you make two souls realize that they are not meant to be!


~ by luckwatchero on September 13, 2007.

6 Responses to “The Inday Adventures (Manuscript)”

  1. galing ni inday mag english ah..hehe..maganda…

  2. thanks sha! hehe! nakuha ko yan sa email! 😆

  3. this is a very interesting account of the responses of inday. nakakatuwang basahin. i will subscribe sa blog mo. please take time reading mine as well.

  4. Sure, no probz!

  5. lolz…sikat na sikat na talaga si Inday ngaun ah..i just received a text today…chinese characters…nasa Singapore na kasi si Inday…LOL

  6. Hahahaha! Hindi ko pa narereceive yan pero yung malalim na tagalog ni Inday, nareceive ko na!

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